Kelly Green's coverage of the Ann Arbor News' coverage of the University of Michigan academic scandal continues. The NCAA, as usual, has reacted quickly and decisively in an attempt to preserve the integrity of the game. NCAA president Myles Brand issued the following statement.

"…"

I… er… well, I'm sure he's getting around to it. After all, he's a busy man, what with Reggie Bush being given a car, a house, and thousands in cash while playing for USC. In fact, he just released the following update regarding that investigation.

"…"

No? Nothing? Well, at least he got Illinois' mascot banned for being offensive to the Illini tribe. Lord knows those brave natives have been through enough alrea… what's that you say? There's no such Indian tribe as the Illini and never has been?! Oh god dammit! When did the NCAA become such a clusterf*ck?!

Anyway, let's take a nice deep breath and get on with the shew…

Part four of Wolverine-gate was by far the biggest waste of time in the whole series. It seems those nefarious characters at UM's athletic department have been using student passwords to enroll athletes in general studies courses. You might want to sit down for this next part. Apparently, this practice violates OFFICIAL UNIVERSITY POLICY! For shame!!!!
Way to go out with a bang.

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